les marteaux 7:44 Sat Aug 30
New Limerick Thread
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Same as before
The football we play to be blunt
Is to most West Ham fans an affront
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Replies - Newest Posts First ( Show In Chronological Order)
arsene york-hunt
2:50 Mon May 27
Re: New Limerick Thread
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My wife really dislikes my porn
But I say that it gives me the horn.
The more that I see,
She just looks at me,
With an air of disgust and scorn.
My local bank cashier called Herman,
Beneath the counter had a Sherman
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Mike Oxsaw
8:36 Sun May 26
Re: New Limerick Thread
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A young girl from Dusseldorf
Decided that she'd shag a dwarf
Little and often
Should not be forgotten
When Percy goes out and sets forth.
My wife really dislikes my porn
But I say that it gives me the horn.
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Helmut Shown
6:24 Sun May 26
Re: New Limerick Thread
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** that
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Helmut Shown
6:23 Sun May 26
Re: New Limerick Thread
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A young man that I know called Martin,
Had problems controlling his farting
When in a crowd
His voice would grow loud
When he felt his anal cheeks parting
A young girl from Dusseldorf
Decided tgat she'd shag a dwarf
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arsene york-hunt
1:58 Sun May 26
Re: New Limerick Thread
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A young wife from the county of Kent
Who suspected her husband was bent,
He couldn't sit down
On inspection she found
That his rectal sphincter was rent.
A young man that I know called Martin,
Had problems controlling his farting
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Helmut Shown
10:31 Sat May 25
Re: New Limerick Thread
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Oops, thats what happens when you eat your dinner mid Limerick
I like a mixture of tipples.
I also like sucking birds' nipples
But its much more fun
When away they can't run
Especially when screwing cripples
A young wife from the county of Kent
Who suspected her husband was bent
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Helmut Shown
10:21 Sat May 25
Re: New Limerick Thread
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So ManU have won it once more
Those cunts I truly abhor
On so many fronts
They're entitled cunts
Their sportsmanship ridiculously poor
A young wife from the county of Kent
Who suspected her husband was bent
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Mike Oxsaw
9:15 Sat May 25
Re: New Limerick Thread
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In his cell he tried hard resisting,
But his cell mate gave him a fisting.
At first he was keen,
But with no Vaseline,
His mate rammed his hand and his wrist in.
I like a mixture of tipples.
I also like sucking birds' nipples
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arsene york-hunt
8:56 Sat May 25
Re: New Limerick Thread
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So ManU have won it once more
Those cunts I truly abhor,
Manure fans, all shits,
They're entitled gits,
Especially those from Bangor.
In his cell he tried hard resisting,
But his cell mate gave him a fisting
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Hello Mrs. Jones
8:34 Sat May 25
Re: New Limerick Thread
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While eating some pie and mash and liquor,
I felt a pain in my old ticker
But if I'd had an eel
As part of the meal
I definitely be so much sicker
So ManU have won it once more
Those cunts I truly abhor
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arsene york-hunt
8:17 Sat May 25
Re: New Limerick Thread
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Should we call him Loppy or J-Lo
Does Anyone here really know,
But let's be blunt,
Most will call him a cunt
If sliding down the table we go.
While eating some pie and mash and liquor,
I felt a pain in my old ticker
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Hello Mrs. Jones
5:36 Sat May 25
Re: New Limerick Thread
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A Moroccan waitress picks up tips
Only using her labial lips
The clear smell of clam
On the sticky dirham
And a slight whiff of fish and chips
Should we call him Loppy or J-Lo
Does Anyone here really know
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arsene york-hunt
5:26 Sat May 25
Re: New Limerick Thread
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On talksport that Martin Keown
Is the ugliest man I have known,
Also Haaland (Erlin').
Is as ugly as sin
He looks just like a dolphin clone.
A Moroccan waitress picks up tips
Only using her labial lips
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Hello Mrs. Jones
11:53 Fri May 24
Re: New Limerick Thread
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Shoplifting a citywide trait
If in Liverpool you collocate
The thieving Souse chaps
Will nick your hubcaps
And likely your new licence plate
On talkssport that Martin Keown
Is the ugliest man I have known
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Helmut Shown
10:56 Fri May 24
Re: New Limerick Thread
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A girl with a very pert arse,
Sat next to me on the grass
As she raised up her hips
I saw pussy lips
I think she's a bit of a brass
Shoplifting a citywide trait
If in Liverpool you colocate
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Mike Oxsaw
10:11 Fri May 24
Re: New Limerick Thread
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Stories of Jesus on the cross,
Considered these days to be dross,
But the ones not to miss
Are of him on the piss
If you do, afraid it's your loss.
A girl with a very pert arse,
Sat next to me on the grass
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arsene york-hunt
9:37 Fri May 24
Re: New Limerick Thread
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One night he awoke with a start
He'd just dropped a very loud fart
The consequence dire,
Caused his wife to expire
As she had a very weak heart.
Stories of Jesus on the cross,
Considered these days to be dross,
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arsene york-hunt
9:37 Fri May 24
Re: New Limerick Thread
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One night he awoke with a start
He'd just dropped a very loud fart
The consequence dire,
Caused his wife to expire
As she had a very weak heart.
Stories of Jesus on the cross,
Considered these days to be dross,
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Helmut Shown
8:15 Fri May 24
Re: New Limerick Thread
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Its clear Paqueta will be barred
All for a phony yellow card
But if you're one of the six
And their FFP tricks
You have a free pass safeguard
One night he awoke with a start
He'd just dropped a very loud fart
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Hello Mrs. Jones
4:02 Fri May 24
Re: New Limerick Thread
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Political donors are in the fast lane
treasury coffers they're allowed to drain
For all of my life
Corruption’s been rife
I think I’ll just fuck off to Spain
Its clear Paqueta will be barred
All for a phony yellow card
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Helmut Shown
11:38 Thu May 23
Re: New Limerick Thread
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The Chinese are very democratic
The have election each day, automatic.
Russians vote with their feet
They fall to the street
Being pushed from a hotel attic
Political donors are in the fast lane
treasury coffers they're allowed to drain
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